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LETTERS FROM STEPH>
God is Good
January 9, 2008
Hello friends, it is now 2008! I don’t know about you but I
am still reeling from all the Christmas activities. So now
we have to wind down and try to get back to our lives with
school and extracurricular activities, keeping up with
husband’s and kids’ schedules.
Have you made a New Year’s Resolution? Have you decided
what you want to change? I have to admit that I don’t
usually make Resolutions. Why? Because I know I can’t keep
them. It usually takes me a lloooooooonng time to change
things. I shared with you last month that I’m a
procrastinator and usually the last one to get anything
done. My kids have to remind me constantly that they need
this or that or have some activity going on at school. I’m
not the kind of mom who hits or yells, I just forget things
or do them at the last minute.
So my New Year’s Resolution this year? Or as I like to call
it, my New Life Resolution is to write it all down. If
someone reminds me of something they need or need to do,
I’ll write it down in my little calendar or notebook. Now
maybe this mom won’t be so ditzy!!
I hope you enjoy the rest of the newsletter and pass it on
to someone who needs it……..
*****
This was the first thing I read from the “funny and True
Tales of Motherhood 2006 Calendar”:
You know you’re a real mom when …. You wait to flush until
the kids are up from their naps.
*****
CONFESSIONS OF A NORMAL PERSON:
I’m a little angry right now. Most of you know the story of
my ex-husband and his child support, no, make that
non-payment of child support. But you may not so I’ll try
to make a long story short. He has fought with me and the
state of California’s court system about payment of his
child support since 2001. He has racked up more than
$20,000 in attorney’s fees for both of us and tried every
imaginable way he could to not pay. He has always been
inconsistent in his payments and so he owes me $33,000 in
back child support. And currently, he is 3 months behind.
Again!
It galls me that he makes almost twice the yearly income
that we do yet he claims he can’t afford to pay to support
his children. And we struggle each month when he does not
pay, sometimes having to use our credit cards to pay for
groceries. I keep thinking: how is it fair that he has all
the money and none of the responsibility? And how can he
think its okay to fight paying his child support? Does he
think his kids are going to eat the grass, that we have all
money we need to feed teenagers? And he must think that we
are living high and mighty on his money. Don’t I wish? No,
I don’t wish. I just want enough to feed my kids, buy them
clothes when they need it and let them go out with friends
sometimes. They are teenagers, after all.
But each time I have to say no when the kids ask me for
money, anger rears its ugly head again. And then I have to
take a huge breath and give him to God. God will take care
of it and God will take His Vengeance. And He has, each and
every court hearing has gone in my favor. The latest of
these was that the judge ruled he owes my attorney a big
chunk of my legal fees because each time he has initiated a
motion, we have won and he has basically wasted the court’s
time. So while my first reaction is anger, then I think of
all the debt he’s racked up trying not to pay I laugh and
praise god.
So I want to encourage you to look at the bright side this
year. Find something good that could possibility come out
of your situation. After all, God has a plan and it’s
always a plan for our good. We are never going to know the
outcome before God wants us to know. But we have to try to
remember that God is in control and whatever happens god
only wants good things for us.
*****
God’s Bumper Stickers
1. Plan ahead - it wasn't raining when Noah built the ark!
2. Most people want to serve God - but only in an advisory
capacity.
3. Having truth decay? Brush up on your Bible!
4. Exercise daily - walk with the Lord!
5. If you've got enough of Jesus to get to heaven, you have
enough Jesus to get you to church.
6. The perfect Church - for those who aren't!
7. Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous!
8. Remember the banana - when it left the bunch it got
skinned.
9. Wisdom has two parts: 1- Having a lot to say 2- Not
saying it.
10. Hem your day with prayer and it will be less apt to
unravel at the edges.
*****Shelby’s Space*****
As many of you know, our family spent a month in Bwerenga
Village in Uganda, East Africa this last July. What a life
changing experience. Our time was spent repairing the homes
in a small neglected village, called Bwerenga, with the
population of about 75 men, women and children. When we
first arrived, my husband, Mike, being the Project Manager
that he is, had us all walk around the village, taking note
of the projects that needed our attention. The adults at
Bwerenga followed us around, filled with excitement because
of the repairs that were going to take place. Mike created
a materials list and a tentative work schedule later that
evening. (Did I mention that he is thorough?) The following
day we went to work. The first project was to move the
tenants from their home to another location in the village.
This was not an easy process, especially for the oldest
member, Jaja Flo, who is 92 years old. "Jaja" is an
honorable term you use when addressing an elderly person,
especially considering the aged are a rarity in this
country. And, over the years Jaja Flo had accumulated many
items.
We learned very quickly that as unassuming and undesirable
these items were to us as Americans, they were Jaja's
treasures. A broken piece of pottery, a toaster oven
(although there was not electricity to power it), cock
roach infested furniture, moldy bed mattresses. Items we
would very quickly take to the garbage pile she had kept
for years. Instead, we moved all her belongings to her
temporary dwelling.
One could plainly see that this was a very traumatic
process for Jaja so our group worked very carefully and
diligently to make her feel at peace as we very carefully
moved her precious collection. That day of moving just so
happened to be one of the warmest days during our stay, so
it made the hauling process even a bit more challenging.
As uncomfortable as Jaja was with her relocation, she still
realized that our group was there to help her, repairing
her home, making it better. Jaja is a gracious woman and
offered me a place to sit, to rest for a bit. (Moving the
heavy items is considered a man's job so she was quite
impressed with my strength and stamina!) So, with her
broken English mixed with her native tongue, Luganda, she
asked me to sit down on her couch. I looked down at the
torn and worn, roach infested (3 inches large!) furniture
and knew instantly that my reaction was very critical. It
would be highly offensive if I refused her offer. So, I sat
down and wiped my brow with the handkerchief that she
offered. This simple act began to build a bridge between
she and I, regardless of the language barrier.
After everyone was relocated, a pest terminator was hired
to rid the homes of the cock roaches, enormous
black/red/blue spiders, mud daubers and a variety of larvae
that were found in the cracks of the walls. This would
ensure a more even paint job on the walls, knowing we would
not be working around moving creatures. During the next 3
weeks, we prepped, primed and painted. Debris was cleaned
up and much of it wheel barrowed down to the burn pile. The
disintegrated rafters and worn metal roofing had taken a
beating over the last number of years with the regular
torrential downpours. It was all removed leaving each home
without any overhead structure. New rafters were installed
and there was a noticeable improvement at Bwerenga.
Our work days were long and hard. In fact, I can't think of
a time when I had experience work so grueling. With the
heavy lifting, my somewhat fit arms and shoulders ached.
And, at sometime, please ask me about the days when we
scraped off the mud daubers' nests filled with larvae.
Clean drinking water was not on hand so it was very common
for one of us to become dehydrated by mid morning.
Eventually we learned to appreciate the readily available
sugar cane and the hydration it provides. After bathing in
a bucket of hot water, the cot was a welcome sight as we
turned in each night, each of us falling asleep almost
instantly as our heads hit the pillow.
What made the toilsome work worthwhile and rewarding was
the appreciation shown by our new friends at Bwerenga. They
served us a delicious lunchtime meal everyday. During our
work hours, when one would walk by us, they would say, "You
do a very good work." More commonly, our village friends
would say, "Way ba lay," which means thank you. And, from
Jaja, we would often hear, "Ka toneda maloonge." God is
good. Hearing the continual words of support and thanks
inspired me to push myself just a little bit harder,
working a little longer than expected and going back for
one extra wheelbarrow filled with roofing debris. This
people needed so much and I knew that I had a lot to give.
It is amazing how invigorating encouragement can be.
One work day in particular stands out in my recollection. I
was working near Jaja's new temporary home and she stopped
me, asking me to stay, not move. She went inside her room
and I waited, staying, not moving. Soon she appeared with a
tattered yet colorful straw mat that was rolled up under
her arm. With her small, frail, crippled body she managed
to sweep an area of dirt ground, clearing it of small rocks
with a hand made straw broom that my son, Ty, had given her
days earlier. Her breathing became heavy but I knew that I
could not interfere with her act of kindness. Jaja began to
unroll her mat and I watched her intently, knowing that
this was, in fact, a very special moment in time.
After the resting place was properly prepared in an almost
ceremonious manner, Jaja extended her arm towards me,
asking me to sit, taking a place of honor on her mat
offered. I genuinely thanked her as I welcomed this much
needed break. Then she lowered herself next to me. In
silence, we both looked straight ahead, taking in deep
sighs of relief, enjoying the view: the extensive grassy
field, surrounded by the village's lush garden, beautiful
stone paths, massive umbrella trees, leading to the
shoreline of Lake Victoria stretched out in front of us.
The sun was just beginning to set, coloring the sky with
beautiful, fiery shades of red and orange.
At that moment, I realized that the more magnificent
picture was not ahead of us but right then and there, on
that splendid mat. Two women from different generations and
opposite worlds. Both enjoying the tiredness that sometimes
comes when serving someone in need.
Shelby Howard
*****
So that’s all for today. I hope you found something to
inspire or encourage you, and if not, send it on to someone
else. Remember that I am always available to talk
(artistmomof5@gmail.com), that I love you but not as much
as God does and every day is a gift from God.
Love and hugs, Steph
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